Sex, Marriage & Fairytales: My perspective

Now this blog post is gonna be a little different.. it's not me gallivanting on about my European adventures. Just my perspective on an amazing piece of poetry. If you haven't seen this video yet, I'm kind of surprised. It's probably been floating around Facebook for about two weeks now. But if you haven't seen it, take notes. Even for those who can't (or don't want to) grasp the biblical concepts.. there's still something you can learn from this young man.

This is a constant argument that I have with a few particular people: is it better to fall head over heels or have friendship develop into something more? 

Well, I'm big on the friendship thing. That might be because I'm the friendship girl, or the fact that I immediately put everyone in the friend zone? Or maybe because I'm the offspring of the growing phenomenon called divorce? (Don't get me wrong though.. divorce can be an amazing thing-when it's not a cop out) Or maybe it's just plain because I'm scared?

There I said it, I'm scared. Who wouldn't be right? Growing up in a day and age where 50% of marriages are predicted to fail and that rate continues to grow. Oh being the Disney fanatic that I am, I'd love my prince charming to come riding in on his white horse and sweep me off my feet and go riding off into the sunset. But I mean come on.. how many princes do you know? and how many of them own a white horse?

Also, that's not really what I want. 

Here's my opinion on the matter: too many people mistake love for lust and caring for infatuation. I distinctly remember the conversation of whether "chemistry" was an essential factor in determining the future of a relationship and how it's a demonstration of love. There we were in the local Pizza Hut in the lovely small town of Greenwood, SC and the conversation began. "Said person" said to them it is the most important factor of building a relationship. My grandfather and I disagreed with "said person". Now what you need to know is my grandfather isn't your typical good ole country man where you sit on his lap and he gives you candy. No, this man is your Lt. Colonel in the Marine Corps and by damn if he disagrees with you, you're going to know about it, and why he disagrees.. and it's probably going to be a little loud too. So with the two of us.. people kind of started staring. Geeze louise, my poor grandma just begging us to stop arguing and "just shush". 

Anyway, I hate the word chemistry for two reasons:

1. It was my least favorite subject in high school & caused me to change my major in college(that part I'm thankful for).

2. Because in my opinion, and please do remember this is all my opinion, people have a common misconception of what chemistry as a foundation for a good relationship actually is. 

Hell people, why do you automatically have to turn chemistry in to lust? You know chemistry can just be the way you get along, the simple ability to have a free flowing conversation. Now I'm not saying there's not a physical part to a relationship because there definitely is. Here's what I'm saying: Physical fizzes out. That is from a relationship that is solely built on the physical. And don't tell me I'm wrong.. because I'm in college and I've seen it happen to the best of friends. Why do you think it's so complicated and there's all that drama of "are we really together" "he's a jerk" "he just wants to sleep with me"? Well hell, why wouldn't he just want to sleep with you when you made it so easy for him to do in the first place? Once again, in my opinion, healthy stable relationships are built differently and the physical aspect works in them without making one of the partners (in most cases the girl) become mental from the constant emotional drainage lustful relationships cause. 

The reason I say friendship is the best route is because of this: Too often when a couple rushes into relationships, they don't know things about their counterpart, and over time as they learn quirky habits & they're quick to dismiss the whole relationship. So tell me this... I know each and every one of you has a friend with quirky habits and you love them for it right? So why is it that in a romance relationship we use it as a cop out? 

When you build a foundation of actual reality, good morals, trust, and I know this is a little far-fetched for some of you.. but the Bible, that's when you get something that lasts. 

Like my grandfather says: If you're in the relationship for all of the right reasons, you'll work through the hard times and one day it'll be 56 years later and you'll fall more in love every single day. And you know what.. that's when you have yourself a fairytale.